2/19/2012

Am I really cut out for this? I feel like the attorney from the secretary movie. I chilled with my friend yesterday and I'm glad he keeps it real. But as I laid there telling Jay about Dee his words hit me like a ton of bricks. "Why would you try and be something that you are not?" I wanted to cry.

Trust

My trust is not something I give out to whomever walks in and out of my life. I trust people to a certain extent and then it doesn't go beyond that.
Maybe it is the Scorpio in me I don't know; but I am a very fickle person. There are things a person can say, do, or even wear that will turn me completely off. The matter at hand is trust. In my relationships dealing with the opposite sex I trust an individual based on what they have shown me. This one I don't trust enough to share anything about me from the fear of being judged and losing a friend. That one I don't trust from fear of having no discretion. This one over here I don't trust cause a seed is planted in my brain that permits be from going 100. What I don't know is what takes all the sense of security away. Then there is this one I fear I will be caught up in some shit. When I don't fully trust I am withdrawn, shy and less vocal. Closed

"Ok"

I want a spanking :)

STFU

Why even talk *rolls eyes*
I'll be quiet

Hold you down

I just feel like there is nothing more that I can do but stand by and be as much support as possible. Be the strength when needed, be the nurturer when needed, be that boost ; that hope. Faith. Not a day goes by that I don't think what more can I do. Nothing never comes to mind. Just being there when needed is enough to offer.

Dangerous Mind

So far today while at work I ate breakfast then text my life away. I popped my breasts out and snapped pics while sitting at my desk. Told my friend how horny I was. Went to the restroom and made a vid then sent to Master. The vid composed of sucking my nipples, they were really soft by the way. Fingering myself and sucking, licking, and living the taste. Sat here and watched my vid while turning some frames into photos. Tools some regular shots and put on Facebook but of course my expression had fuck me all over it do the pic was subtly naught. Can't say I did much of any work today but I am leaving in an hour so I can go pack to get ready for my weekend. I think when I get home I will masturbate first that way I will have self control while staying at my friends house :(

That feeling

I think I need a companion (boyfriend) or whatever you want to call it. Oh wait I have a couple of those. Well I need someone that understands my ins and outs and vice versa. Have fun, chill, watch movies, critique porn, ride out, get low, all that good shit. I don't need all that mushiness but I will accept it if it is given. Just have someone so that I can sen out that notification sorry I have a b/f now. *sighs* Yeah