Selfless

I thought I was being a good friend but I guess all I did was cut the chord. This isn't what I wanted. Not for it to be this extreme.
I am so green right now. Her words cut me every day but I never say anything. Everyday they pop up I'm scared to read them but I do. Why, because how else would I know anything. Then once I obtain the knowledge it fuels me. I try to use it in a positive way but that goes not rewarded. Then it turns to a river of emotions. Fear, pain, and hurt. Tears. I always say it is too much. Why am I going through this. Do I honestly want to? Do I need to? It's a catch 22. I really think she is selfish her words ring of a person that wants what they want not caring for other individuals. Not sacrificing. At the end of the day I respect what I did and everyone and they momma know that is not what I wanted but it's not about me. That's what real friends do. They help wanting nothing in return; just because. *sighs* still her words hurt. I'll get over it. Maybe if I didn't open them and stopped reading them. ......but I can't tho. Smh